"To err is human, but to persist is diabolical."
This is a folly that I have seen a lot of lately, and it is the root of a lot of toxic behavior that I have seen, both first hand, and observing it third-hand as it happens to others.
It is the fear of being wrong, or being told that you are wrong. In some cases, it's even a fear that one's beliefs are not even facts, but rather opinions, even in some cases a perfectly valid one, but the irrational fear makes the holder desperate for it to be fact.
It occurs in a lot of issues. Whether you like triple-A games, or you think major corporations have destroyed the game industry. Whether guns should be legal, or outlawed. Whether Kanye West is a misunderstood genius, or a blubbering idiot. And I won't even mention the run-of-the-mill political stuff because that stuff is the ONLY thing you'll ever see on the news these days, so it really needs no mention. That's a problem, too.
These are polarizing issues - and if you are on one side or another, where you can't back down and TRY to understand the opposing side - YOU are part of the problem. You fit the very definition of atychiphobia - because your strong opinions - your passionately held beliefs - have clouded your ability to see reason. Toxicity does not come from people who disagree with you - it comes from both you and anyone willing to spend more than a minute arguing with you about it.
I remember the day of the September 11th attacks, and how for the first time in a very long time, it finally seemed like everyone in the U.S. was on the same team. How united we were. Because we ALL wanted to bring the masterminds behind that attack to justice - and while we may have had different ideas about how to do so, we were united in our shock and disgust that anyone would ever do such a thing to our society. We actually agreed that the actions those criminals took that day was heinous, and we cried for the victims - together. It was the one day when there were no Democrats or Republicans. And despite the horrific tragedy that befell us that day, it showed that we actually do have the capacity to love one another, and stop being the petulant children we've become since it happened.
Yet, today, we can't even maturely have a conversation over simple issues in a freaking video game, stuff that ultimately does not affect our real lives - because everyone believes they are always right, they can't possibly be wrong, and those who disagree with them are heretics and deserve to be tarred and feathered and paraded around in the public square. Really? What a disgrace.
Look - it's okay to be wrong. It's okay to make mistakes. It's okay to be - well, you know, a freaking human being. But your pride and your hubris - as the quote says, that's diabolical. That's what makes you evil. That's what makes you toxic. You can't acknowledge that there's a different side. That someone sees things differently. That you aren't right - that you merely have an opinion. And that it's okay to have one. That you don't have to be right all the time.
It's not just this community. This problem is so wide-spread. The crap that spews out into many gaming forums is merely a symptom of a much bigger problem in our society as a whole, not just the games themselves. Over the past couple of decades, we've forgotten every last shred of social grace we've once known. We've forgotten how to be decent human beings to each other. Is it really too much to ask to say "I don't like this" instead of saying "you're an idiot"?
The problem isn't social media bringing massive amounts of people together. All those things ever did was shine a light on it. The problem is - you don't know how to disagree with a stranger and not be a total douche bag about it. The problem is you think everyone else is your enemy - even when they're not. You're so paranoid, so insecure, and you use your pride to mask what you secretly think are your worst qualities as a person - when in fact they may be your best. The thing you should be ashamed of is your fear of being wrong. Your pride. Your atychiphobia.
To some extent - everyone is afraid of being wrong. That's perfectly normal. It's what you do about it that defines how good you are as a person - but trust me when I say, sticking to your guns might be the worst mistake you can make. If you do that, make sure you have a really good reason to do it, and you have external factors that can back that up and prove your case - because a lot of times, people don't. And if you don't - be willing to accept new ideas, be willing to see things in a different light, from a different position, and from another person's shoes. You'd be surprised what you can learn - how you can grow - and how much better of a person you can become.
To put it simply - the world is not as you see it. What you see is an illusion. The truth is - the world is what the world is, and no human in the world has the capacity to understand it fully. Every day, we are all growing, we are all learning new things, and we are all becoming better people. Be a part of that. Be the person you want to be, not the person you think you should be.